[Strange Goings On Around The Hangers]

Hi Madaz:

The Lago Ultralight's wheels did sink into the hillside slightly; I will try to research this and see what can be done about it. :roll:

You should try the downhill takeoff on this altiport! 8)

SoCal: Thanks for the kind feedback. :D

Actually, as a side interest to navigating for my real world flying in a Lake Amphibian LA4-200 EP with my colleague, I dabble in FS scenery making/tweaking, and have developed a fair working knowledge of the FS Scenery SDK's, geographic information systems (GIS), and the free governmental resources of data, maps and imagery online. :wink:

My imagery above is respectively top to bottom: GoogleEarth, Washington State Shoreline Aerial Photos

( see: http://apps.ecy.wa.gov/shorephotos/scriid=MAS0611 ),

and USGS DOQQ TerraServer Aerial Photos via USA Photomaps ( see: http://www.jdmcox.com ), all edited in Corel PhotoPaint. :idea:

PS: Some days I wonder if I actually do just work for the government! :?

GaryGB

[Strange Goings On Around The Hangers]

Hi Pups:

Thanks for the calculations. I was struck by how much more steep the slope virtually is in FS2004 compared to the topo charts, so I recalculated for a slope angle from Hwy 101 to the summit at Bill's Bluff and got 13 degrees, but it still looks too low. :shock:

Regardless of the basis for the difference (I guess it's an optical illusion since I checked the side view with a large protractor on my monitor and it really is 13 degrees in FS), it will take some fancy flying in FS to avoid ending up taxidermied on the wall in the Emma clubhouse, fixed in some daring aviator's pose after the crash! 8)

GaryGB

[Strange Goings On Around The Hangers]

Hi Pups:

1) If you ignore Mel Gibson and Robert Downey Jr. and focus on the aerobatic stunts with the planes and their whacked-out pilots (like the guys here at Emma), Air America can actually be a very entertaining movie. Ya' gotta see the hillside landing and takeoff in the Porter at least once, not to mention the "no gear or engines landing" in a C-123! 8)

2) Sorry for the lack of clarity in my earlier post; I should have written: "We can do the Turbo Porter hillside landings in FS2004 on the 'North Rubio Drive Emma Altiport Annex' (which climbs from Lilliwaup at sea level up to the 600 ft. elevation area known as "Bill's Bluff" in Flight Unlimited III) near the approach to Emma's new runway 32 overlooking the Hood canal. :roll:

3) I suppose when it rains, the altiport runway annex is "slopped" with mud, because it looks unpaved! :wink:

GaryGB

[Strange Goings On Around The Hangers]

oops!

[I'm gonna be in Trouble]

PS: "Universes can come to existence from a very small amount (less than a hundred-thousandth gram) of matter through inflation."

"Caution: The Mass of This Product Contains the Energy Equivalent of 85 Million Tons of TNT per Net Ounce of Weight.") :twisted:

Hi Pups:

Sorry to overwork your brain on a weekend, but it looks like we now need the figures for the number of potential 'hundred-thousandth of a gram' universes contained in a 1 liter bottle of Uncle Elmer's too! :roll:

Then, assuming standard inflation at a given point of inception and the proper balance of both original recipe Light and Dark Matter, we could derive the increase of energy an "Altidude" could stand to gain by drinking a 1 ounce shot of uncle Elmers! :idea:

(see: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gram and http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/shot-glass )

Uncle Elmers "Powerhouse"... the original "Energy Drink"! :shock:

GaryGB

[I'm gonna be in Trouble]

oops!

[I'm gonna be in Trouble]

I got crafty and used the C/Card to add balance to a PaypPal account and clicked Purchace via PayPal.

With luck it should appear on the C/Card Statement/Bill as PayPal and I can convince the Lady it was an E-Bay purchace for some thing for her :lol: 8) :lol: 8) :lol:

That way she won't know It was Add-On's for Flight Sim..

(Usually I get my Add-On's from the Game store as 'Just Flight' Packaged products.. I can save my allowance and buy them without question.. But C/Card buying.. is a No No)

Hi Madaz:

I think you've devised a way to solve a major 'audit trail' problem many FS enthusiasts have had for a long time! Ingenious! :shock:

GaryGB

[gear collapse]

Hi Chris:

Which topic: redneck aviation, healthcare issues, ...or perhaps elephant jokes? :roll:

(see: http://forums.simflight.com/viewtopic.p4&start=60 )

GaryGB

[I'm gonna be in Trouble]

Hi Pups:

So, should we regard the tale of Virgin-ia as a treatise on the "Osculatory" universe instead? :roll:

PS: "Universes can come to existence from a very small amount (less than a hundred-thousandth gram) of matter through inflation; According to chaotic inflation theory it is theorically possible to 'cook up' a new universe in a laboratory; It raises the question of whether our universe was created in this manner." :idea:

Speaking of angels and 'pinheads', this raises the question of whether the Fritz Deter family moonshine operation might be viewed as a cosmic joint partner in the very process of creation itself, toiling over the mash tank and still like they do! :shock:

Hmmm... lets see... from the less quoted part of the Book of Genesis 2:4-6 we might see the role played by Uncle Elmer's still: "...there went up a mist from the earth, and watered the whole face of the ground." :wink:

(Uh-Oh, questioning systems of belief in an FS forum... now "I'm gonna be in Trouble" too! :oops:

By the way, I heard that Uncle Elmer already came up with his own version of the 'chaotic inflation theory and bubble theory' of creation which he discovered while expelling gas in the bathtub; he named it after the 'sound of creation': <O'Rourke>! :lol:

( see: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Multiverse and http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chaotic_inflation_theory )

(All the more reason to use the latter disclaimer on every bottle of Uncle Elmer's #5: "Caution: The Mass of This Product Contains the Energy Equivalent of 85 Million Tons of TNT per Net Ounce of Weight.") :twisted:

GaryGB

[Strange Goings On Around The Hangers]

:lol: :lol: :lol:

Awesome work, Madaz!

I think we are well on our way to re-enacting the rural STOL stunt scenes from the movie "Air America" at Emma with the C-123 and PC-6 Porter. :D

All I need now is an abandoned fuselage of a crash landed C-123 torn wide open, and placed on the south side of the runway 32 end, pointing towards the northwest... :twisted:

Anybody got an old static bgl of an open C-123 fuselage they can spare for the show? :wink:

We can do the Turbo Porter hillside landings in FS2004 on the "North Rubio Drive Emma Altiport Annex" which climbs from Lilliwaup at sea level up to the 600 ft. elevation area (near the approach to Emma's new runway 32) overlooking the Hood canal. The useable length of 0.47 miles slopes up from approximately 560 ft. to 600 ft. from the 355 degree approach heading. 8)

Pups can calculate the angle of slope on this Altiport like a good Altidude using his trusty LCD graphing calculator that he keeps in his hip holster all the time for on-the-fly approach calculations. :idea:

Coincidentally, this "Emma altiport annex" is next to the (fictional) vacation home overlooking the Hood canal of a certain Seattle software entrepreneur billionaire; he was implicated in an unstoppable real estate buyout of some land 1/2 mile east of our present day Emma years ago, delaying Fritz's plans to create an aeropark, so the noise we create there for "Bill" should be "richly" deserved! :evil: (see: http://forums.simflight.com/viewtopic.pc&start=45 )

PS: Madaz, When you park at Bills Bluff, be sure to use the parking brake!

(see: http://www.air-america.org/ImageLibraryery1.shtml )

Other interesting Air America Links:

http://www.vietnam.ttu.edu/airamerica/bmerica.htm

http://www.air-america.org/About/History.shtml

http://www.avweb.com/news/columns/182080-1.html (Holy Crap... Flying Pigs ?)

http://www.bestaero.com/features/danaher/potm.htm (What a pilot! What a History Too!)

GaryGB

[I'm gonna be in Trouble]

Far Out, Pups! :lol: :lol: :lol:

You sure you don't drink in the real world? :shock:

Talk about "multi-verse"! :wink:

All those people letting go strangely makes for a gripping tale... :P

PS: So, they called her "Virgin" for short... but not for long? :twisted:

GaryGB

[I'm gonna be in Trouble]

:lol: :lol: :lol:

Ah yes, now I recall, Simon! Yeah, it was the dreaded change of seasons vs. latitude and installed texture bug. I've scanned posts about that in the past, but never really paid much attention to the cause and solution.

I believe it was still present in some scenarios of FS2004 as well, in the upper U.S. latitudes and Canada. I think it has been solved by Holger, Arno and some others; I'll look it up sometime just in case the Gremlins show their ugly faces around our beloved Emma again... :wink:

I rather like the jovial reference to EFFC nostalgia in your avatar, and would enjoy seeing it in the future! Amazing how fast time passes in the computer world. It seems that time goes faster when one is processing greater volumes of information, such as computer stuff and FS always has us do. :P

I'll bet Pups has a Quantum Mechanical theory on just how this process works. Hmmm... if the space in the virtual FS world is curved too, is it nested snugly inside one or more of the planes in the "multiverse"? Or is the multiverse just his own nickname for his style of storytelling/limericks? :roll:

Thanks for reminding me of the good & 'bad' old times of Emma, Simon! 8)

GaryGB

[gear collapse]

Hi Jeroen:

Sounds like you have a valid historical basis for caution; healthcare mishaps by stressed out and/or cynical providers working in a managed care setting have increased the need for patients to abide by the cautionary statement: "Consumer Beware". :shock:

I have heard there are also private clinics and even hospitals in India and Thailand which have state of the art facilities and Doctors providing top quality care in a setting which costs substantially less than other countries without the attendant casualty rate. Interesting alternatives... :roll:

Take Care! :wink:

GaryGB

[I'm gonna be in Trouble]

Hey Simon, I noticed the "16% Club" reference on your Avatar icon; I was just wondering if it was a celebration of the approximate amount of pure Olympic Mountain water in Uncle Elmers #5 Hooch

(see: http://forums.simflight.com/viewtopic.pght=tanked ). :D

What with your being a rather well polished fellow with "a carefully tweaked alpha channel", it probably means something else much more respectable which I just can't remember from old EFFC Forum posts.:shock:

By positioning yourself at a proper angle to the sun, could you shed a light on the subject of the mysterious 16% club for me? (This isn't one of those new fangled Hollywood Cabbala or Opus Dei organizations is it?) :twisted:

Looking forward to your reply, Obi-Wan... :roll:

GaryGB

[I'm gonna be in Trouble]

Hi Pups:

I haven't dabbled with the heavies much yet; mostly a GA guy, and mostly an amphibian guy at that, except when it comes to the porter fixed gear and the ski version.

But I must say, for a fun intermediate size aircraft with an awesome audio experience to try out (if you haven't do so already) I recommend Milton Shupe's DASH-7 with the 4-turboprop sound file produced apparently by 1 of the 4 horsemen of the apocalypse ! (see: http://library.avsim.net/esearch.php?CaDLID=35431 )

Happy Flying... 8)

GaryGB

[I'm gonna be in Trouble]

Gary:

I've scoured the internet for Radial Sound sets to create a "As Close as I can get it" sound set for the 'Bou. They were available from Virtual Pilot as part of an Orcas Island Repaint of Mike Stone's DHC-4 Caribou. Unfortunatly the Download server from 'VP.net' is down so have to wait till it's back up and (I'll) send terry a New 'Updated' set of sounds, panel, and flight Handling for Mr Stone's Bou.

BTW.. I happen to live where the RAAF have a 'Detachment' of 4 x DHC-4 Caribous.. I hear these things every day..

I grew up listening to them, and watching them do STOL practice at the near by Army base.

Just so happened that the Australian Army had Pilatus Porters too at the time.

Hi Madaz:

Not only are you a gentleman and a scholar from the school of hard knocks, you're an "Altidude" and a "Geek'A'Bou" (an advanced caribou geek)! 8)

I'll look forward to trying out your enhancements when Terry rebuilds, or Simon covers for him temporarily. :idea:

(see: http://forums.simflight.com/viewtopic.php?t=52926 )

Wow, Caribous AND Porters both... life is as good down under in Australia as it is down under the bar at Emma's clubhouse! :P

I'd like to see your aerobatic stunts with the 'bou sometime too! :wink:

PS: Got any real world pics or videos of 'our' favorite plane(s) you can share online?

GaryGB

[gear collapse]

Hi Jeroen:

Here in the U.S., average Doctor-Patient contact time for outpatient office visits is 6 minutes. I'd love to believe that is always because the clinician is so sharp that he has things diagnosed and treatment/intervention/referral implemented that quickly.

But with 'managed' care, fees have been driven down so severely, that medical practices must see larger volumes of people in a year to make operating expenses, much less a profitable income. Sort of a point of diminishing returns for the healthcare consumer, resulting from tactics used by the insurors which they claim is all being done "on behalf of their insureds".

All too often, the "savings" and "increased accessibility" supposed to be brought about by managed care fees just results in more money for the insuror, longer waits for Patients, and more jobs for insurors' staff who then try boost provider network enrollment by making life difficult for private practices who have not "signed up" yet; the consumer and the Doctor both getting lost and disadvantaged in the midst of the process.

But on a more cheerful note, has my previous presciption for comedy relief improved your sense of humor yet? :roll:

GaryGB

[gear collapse]

Hi Jeroen:

Hope you'll be back in service soon; welcome to corporate medicine, where everything becomes 'non-urgent' care! :?

Hmmm... a decade between visits? Just remember to think of how hard it would be to work toe brakes with a pegleg...

In the mean time, you could try some of the improvised measures used in the moves: The Flight of the Phoenix, and Six days, Seven Nights!

See: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Flight_of_the_Phoenix

and: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Six_Days_Seven_Nights

(Generally speaking, as an amphibian flyer, I'd always welcome a chance to turn a fixed gear into at least a float plane)!

While you wait for your appointment, may I prescribe some aviation comedy relief?

Here are some actual maintenance complaints submitted by US Air Force Pilots and the replies from the Maintenance crews. :D

(P) Left inside main tire almost needs replacement

(M) Almost replaced left inside main tire

(P) Test flight OK, except "autoland" is very rough

(M) "Autoland" not installed on this aircraft

(P) #2 propeller seeping prop fluid

(M) #2 propeller seepage normal - #1 #3 and #4 propellers lack normal seepage

(P) Something loose in cockpit

(M) Something tightened in cockpit

(P) Evidence of leak on right main landing gear

(M) Evidence removed

(P) DME volume unbelievably loud

(M) Volume set to a more believable level

(P) Dead bugs on windshield

(M) Live bugs on order

(P) Autopilot in altitude hold mode produces a 200 fpm descent

(M) Cannot reproduce problem on the ground

(P) IFF inoperative

(M) IFF always inoperative in OFF mode

(P) Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick

(M) That´s what they are there for

(P) Number three engine missing

(M) Engine found on right wing after brief search

(P) Aircraft handles funny

(M) Aircraft warned to straighten up, "fly right" and be serious

(P) Target Radar hums

(M) Reprogrammed Target Radar with the words

Oh, and Fritz was overheard telling these jokes at the last barbeque: :P

You May Be A Redneck Pilot If...

... your stall warning plays "Dixie."

... your cross-country flight plan uses flea markets as check points.

... you think sectionals charts should show trailer parks.

... you've ever used moonshine as avgas.

... you have mud flaps on your wheel pants.

... you think GPS stands for going perfectly straight.

... your toothpick keeps poking your mike.

... you constantly confuse Beechcraft with Beechnut.

... just before impact, you are heard saying, "Hey y'all, watch this!"

... you have a black airplane with a big #3 on the side.

... you've ever just taxied around the airport drinking beer.

... you use a Purina feed bag for a windsock.

... you fuel your wizzbang 140 from a Mason jar.

... you wouldn't be caught dead flyin' a Grumman "Yankee."

... you refer to flying in formation as "We got ourselves a convoy!"

... there is a sign on the side of your aircraft advertising your septic tank service.

... when you are the owner of Red Neck Airlines and pilot of Redneck One.

... you subscribe to The Southern Aviator because of the soft paper!

... you have ever incorporated sheetrock into the repair of your aircraft.

... you have ever responded to ATC with the phrase "That's a big 10-4!"

... you typically answer female controllers with titles like "sugar" or "little darlin'."

... she responds with the words "Honey" or "Big guy" then she may be a redneck.

... you have ever used a relief tube as a spitoon.

... you glance down at your belt buckle to help you remember your N-number.

... you have ever tried to impress your girlfriend by buzzing her doublewide.

... the preprinted portion of your weight and balance sheet contains "Case of Bud."

... your go/no-go checklist includes the words "Skoal" or "Redman."

See: http://www.flyingtoys.com/pages/aviation.php (lots of great stuff!)

Take Care! :mrgreen:

GaryGB

[WHAT I DID OVER THE WEEKEND]

OK Guys, I accept the inferred challenge! :wink:

For Cecil: "Three-Legged Chickens"

A man was driving along a freeway when he noticed a chicken running alongside his car. He was amazed to see the chicken keeping up with him, as he was doing 50 mph. He accelerated to 60, and the chicken stayed right next to him. He sped up to 75 mph, and the chicken passed him. The man noticed that the chicken had three legs. So he followed the chicken down a road and ended up at a farm. He got out of his car and saw that all the chickens had three legs. He asked the farmer, "What's up with these chickens?" The farmer said "Well, everybody likes chicken legs, so I bred a three-legged bird. I'm going to be a millionaire." The man asked him how they tasted. The farmer said, "Don't know, haven't caught one yet."

For Pups: "Random Chicken Joke"

//Program describing how a chicken would cross the road in Borland's object-oriented version of the Pascal language.

//It was designed so that even an inexperienced programmer could read it.

//It elicited many guffaws and an even larger number of groans, and appeared in Windows Tech Journal

//(in an ad for the magazine, of all places). It went like this:

program KFC;

uses

Salt, Pepper, Flour, HotOil, Poultry, MackTruck;

const

MPH = 90;

var

{Don't reference your chickens before they're declared!}

Chicken : Poultry.Fowl;

Truck : MackTruck.EighteenWheeler;

begin

Chicken.Hatch; {Constructor}

Truck.Start; {Constructor}

Truck.Rev(MPH);

Chicken.Cross(Road);

Truck.Horn.Honk;

Truck.Brake := TRUE;

Truck.Tires.PutStr('Screeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee...');

Chicken.PutStr('Scra-daaaaaaaaaaaaaawk!');

Stop; Look; Listen;

if Chicken.Flat then

Output(Colonel,Chicken);

end. :mrgreen:

GaryGB

[I'm gonna be in Trouble]

Hi Madaz:

Glad to see you're largely satisfied with the new 'bou! I know that among highly informed enthusiasts, there are significant differences between the various types of radial engines and how they sound; its tough sometimes getting things exactly the way we want them in FS isn't it? :P

I also like a deeper, more earth-shaking radial sound in my sim, and have found a few good radial sound sets out on the FS download sites which might be aliased via your sound.cfg file in the 'sound' subfolder of your new 'bou under the FS2004 Aircraft folder system. If you like, I could post some links (assuming you haven't already researched this and implemented some changes yourself, since you seem to know quite a bit about radials as a simmer)! :roll:

Although there a few good freeware ones out there, the most awesome FS radial sound files are the payware Pilots Boeing 314 Clipper sound files; a must-have! (Warning: you won't believe Stefan Schaefer actually toned them down a bit from the originals because he thought that neighbors might try to have his customers declared a public nuisance if they turned up the volume in Flight Sim too loud when flying the B314)! If your lady companion has any glass knicknacks nearby in the house, it might be best to control your volume with this product! :twisted:

Happy Flying! 8)

GaryGB

[McLeland Field]

Hi All:

Regarding some posts in this thread (which apparently have now been removed by Francois since I sent him a PM the other day): I did hear back from Laurie, and there is no known connection with the person using the name Duarie.

Laurie turned out to be one of our male SimFlight forum members too (a name used more commonly in the U.K. than in the U.S. midwest where I live).

Well, let this be a lesson to would-be abusers of other forum participants (regardless of gender), and to the rest of us too, I suppose. It brings to mind a famous quote: "The price of freedom is eternal vigilance". I was searching to see who had made the statement, and brought up an interesting web site of famous quotes about freedom; some thought provoking material there.

( see: http://www.freedomkeys.com/vigil.htm )

Sorry for the digression in an otherwise great thread, Peter; keep up the great work with your creations, and thanks for your continued valuable contributions to the FS experience! :D

GaryGB

[McLeland Field]

Hi Pups:

I sent a PM to Laurie to request her side of the story; since (she?) has been here on the SimFlight Forum system for quite a while, I assume she is familiar with the spectrum of behavior we can all encounter out in the electronic frontier, not that she should have to put up with it here of course.

Hopefully we will hear something back soon.

Kind of ironic that a couple of outrageous humorists like us are doing detective work on "forum propriety" issues, ain't it?

PS: For the benefit of those who might not understand the usage of the word "Tram", in Britain and Europe, the word is used more than "train" to describe a lighter railborne vehicle: see http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tram

The best I could say is that it brings to mind a later Cat Stevens song called "Love Train"; but then again Cat Stevens incurred banishment from entering the U.S. by earning a controversial label as a (recent) Islamic extremist with (presumed) links to terrorist organizations due to certain statements he had previously made in public.

and: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cat_Stevens

see: http://www.littlegreenfootballs.com/weblog/?entry=13542 )

GaryGB

[Good News...Brewster is back.....]

OK so it's now? :lol:

I remember back in 1968 there was a comedian and celebrity named Pat Paulsen who ran for the presidency as a gag, then eventually for real; his platform was called the "Stag Party". :D

A pretty funny fellow, he was one othe earlier comedians to offer more outspoken and probing humor about the political misgivings of the public in the 'revolutionary' times of the late 60's. 8)

( see: http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0667323/bio )

GaryGB

[Good News...Brewster is back.....]

Hi Madaz:

Do you happen to know if the polling devices in Japan run on "Erectricity"? :lol:

PS: If only a 'bou will do, will you do the new 'bou? (Hows the budget negotiations comin'?)

GaryGB

[McLeland Field]

Laurie come home!!!!

You spend too much time at work and drives me crazy. I spend all day slaving over a hot stove, and for what??? You coming home late, or not at all. Even on the days when you do come home you're normally too tired

to make love to me like you used to. Some days i don't know why i even married you!!!!

Don't pretend that you don't know me!

You knew me perfectly well when you were riding my love tram last night.

_________________

My name is Daniel, and i'm a sexy mother.

Laurie, I do hope you 2 actually know each other; if not, I think "Daniel/Duarie" would do well to reconsider the rather inappropriately direct and personal wording "he?" used as above in any subsequent post in any thread where addressing an apparent lady participant who posts reasonably apparent evidence of either not knowing Daniel/Duarie, or not approving of his last post directly addressing that person.

Yep, believe it or not, that's coming from a guy who has himself gotten carried away all too often here recently with some marginally acceptible locker room and bath room humor, in what I sometimes forget is a forum with viewers of all ages and both genders. For my own occasional transgressions, I offer my humble apologies; for my other statements in this particular post, I am also most sincere in my mission to not see anything remotely suggestive of a female being mistreated or caused to feel uncomfortable by direct personal statements of any kind. Indirect is inappropriate enough I suppose, as we have had so few lady forum participants over the years, it would probably behoove us "guys" to encourage more diversity by reconsidering the content of our posts, as those ladies who have visited EFFC forum in the past had some valuable insights and creativity to offer; sad part is they're not around posting any more! I'm MOST concerned what took place in the above posts might be part of the reason why...

Nope, I'm not an administrator of any authority here, just my opinion.

I might be wrong, but I believe it would be best if "Daniel/Duarie" acknowledge truthfully here in a post if he really knows "Laurie" (no, not in the 'Biblical sense' either!) for the sake of the other forum participants. In either case, the expression "govern yourself accordingly" seems like an appropriate consideration here.

Here's hoping my sense of chivalry was only misguided by some very "weird" mischief between you 2! :roll:

And let me be the first to propose penalties for certain gender insensitive infractions in the EFFC forum on a points system, a specified total being punishable by getting one's butt folded up into a pet cage and bounced around the bush routes of Canadian wilderness country in a ConAir flight by Bill Dick's daughter, "Officer" Mindy! :mrgreen:

(see: http://forums.simflight.com/viewtopic.pc&start=15 )

Fire Away, Flamers! :twisted:

GaryGB